Pesky Cream Peddlers and Ex-Destiny

Ok. I just need y'all to know that I've been over-busy lately. I spent most of last week away (which really messes things up back at the office) - When I got back to work - it was busy. I had some volunteer things that also made me busy... so by the time Saturday at 8PM rolled around, I was happy to go sit at the bookstore and have some coffee (Seattle's Best...).

I spent most of the evening wondering why - at the beginning of November - I must listen to Andea Boccelli singing "O Holy Night," among a host of other Christmas songs. This kind of pisses me off. Here's my take: Until Santa brings up the rear of the Macy's parade, I'm not ready for Christmas. Screw the fact that I've decided to do as much of my gift buying BEFORE Thanksgiving if I can manage it... I don't want to hear "Silver Bells" just yet... I'm still eating Halloween candy.

Ok. So today, I was going to lunch with a friend. As I made my way to the restaurant, I'm happy to report yet another thing that pisses me off: Annoying Kiosk Salespeople. There's one booth in particular that sells lotion and salt scrub. It's located at the main hub of the mall - right near Ruby Tuesday's AND Cinnabon's (so you know I have to walk that way whenever I'm in the mall, which isn't all that often - so you know it's important that I get there in a hurry...).

The sales people run out to meet you - and then say, "Excuse me, may I ask you a question?"

"No thank you," I say, keeping a slightly faster pace.

"But I only have one question..."

"NO THANK YOU."

This pisses me off because I feel like mall halls are neutral. I shouldn't be badgered while in transit. (Must... get... to.... Cinnabon's....) Sometimes the pesky cream peddlers actually follow for awhile. It's actually invasive. The hall is Switzerland - I should not be harrassed while on neutral travel ground.

What I really want to explain to the guy is that I am not his victim today or any other day.... but that would mean I'd have to stop and give the PCP an opportunity to blurt his question out. Perhaps if I got a "Not Today's Victim" T-shirt made, it would solve the problem. Maybe I could just say "Get a storefront, buddy."

Ok. What I really wanted to write about was what happened at LUNCH - when my friend got annoyed...

My poor single female friend... We were discussing her on-going issues of being an 'ex. Specifically, a problematic former boy of hers who recently resurfaced after a long absence. He said hello to her.... and I asked her how she was feeling about that.

"I didn't want to talk to him... I don't think I ever really want to talk to him. It's funny," she mused. "I'm the one who broke up with him, and yet I'm still angry."

I kind of understand. I think it's the anger of dashed hopes. In my case, after breakups, I was always angry for having poor judgement. I remember the days following after I broke up with my first real boyfriend. I had a sleepless night, a horrendous day, and came home to cry... and cried my bloodshot eyes out for about thirty seconds. I remember wiping my nose, thinking "What? Oh. I'm all right..." Even though I was the one who got dumped, I couldn't help but feeling incredibly stupid for not ending things myself. "I'm dumb, dumb dumb," I chanted.

When William Congreve said, 'Heaven has no rage like love to hatred turned, nor hell a fury like a woman scorned,' he showed rare insight - except he neglected to add this: especially when that woman's scorn is aimed at herself.

Anyway, my friend was feeling crappy. She's absolutely beautiful, intelligent - and fun. She's just feeling unlucky in love - and I can tell she's getting tired of it - because the rants didn't stop there.

"Did you know Joe's getting married? Can you believe that?" (Joe is another -ex... He followed her around for years after they broke up... He apparently only recently let go - and got engaged rather quickly.)

She explained she was annoyed because for all the weird behavior he'd exhibited, he's getting married. And that's what my friend wants to be - and it's unfair it's happening for him - and not her. She then admitted to something horrible - yet so very very honest, I was sort of touched. "When I see married couples having marital problems, I'm actually kind of glad. It makes me feel like I'm not the only one suffering... That it's hard on the other side too."

Unfortunately, I have no corner on justice - or I'd single handedly leap up, pull out my SuperKell Cape, fly through the mall... Find her soulmate, and keel haul him back to Ruby Tuesdays. The only trouble is - in the time it would take me to find Mr. Perfect O'Perfect, her -ex might saunter into the restaurant - and schedule his new wife's baby shower. So in solidarity, I'll just listen as best as I can.

I'm so sad for my friend... Because she knows that her life is pretty good... It's just not what she envisioned.

I'm telling you, there's nothing worse than dashed hopes. Just ask the pesky cream peddler - upon watching me walk away from him.