Oh No Not I - I Will Survive...

I guess I've never been much of a joiner. Nor am I one to travel in tribes. I never had a clique of friends in high school, and have frequently gone to the ladies' room alone... I have to say, however, that I felt pangs of longing as I read about the friendships in "The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood..." Now, I have my friends, but the idea of having a little group of cose buddies - and keeping them throughout the span of a lifetime is amazing.

Perhaps that's why I agreed to a Girls' Night Out last evening.

My friend Lisa invited me and about 6 other women to an evening of fun and entertainment. We started at "Arts in the Park," where we listened to Latin music for all of 20 minutes. We then hiked 4 blocks to a restaurant, where we had a nice time getting to know each other. One woman talked about her move from New York City, where for the sake of her kids, couldn't continue living in the city where she lost her husband on 9/11. Another two have worked in the mayors' office through the last FOUR mayors. Another has a pile of kids. Another made it a policy not to drink alcohol because she needs to be at a lot of political events - and can't lose her sense of what she should and shouldn't say. It was a very nice group of women.

After dinner, we walked to a theater where we saw a play called "Girls Night..." Let me summarize.

The play begins with a woman dressed in white. She's a ghost - and died in the mid-80's as a teenager. Since death, she's been following her tribe of friends around. Even though they can't see her, they speak of her often. This particular evening, the ghost has followed them to a karaoke bar. During the course of the night, the ladies sing pop songs like "I Need A Hero," "Girls Just Wanna Have Fuh-un," "Man, I feel Like A Woman," "I Will Survive," and other songs designed to get the audience singing along. In between, the women share their tales of woe... And these women have dealt with it all:

- Being ugly in High School
- Having Daddy Issues (Daddy abandoned daughter)
- Having Commitment Issues (because of daddy issues)
- Unspoken Abortion in the past (never told her friends)
- Being afraid of Aging (Rich woman didn't want friend to call out her age)
- Revenge (Pain in the neck woman found out the ghost had slept with her thenboyfriend/nowhusband)
- Pregnancy (the pregnant woman wants to terminate, the lady who had the abortion is begging her not to - without telling her why she feels so strongly about it)

You get it. So the idea is that this play was supposed to give the audience - mostly women in their 40's and older - something to sing, shout about - and relate to... And it was doing everything it could to pull at emotional heart strings - to the point where it got a little preachy for me.

So in the end, when everyone's on their feet, singing with the ghost of the past and the hope of the future, belting out Shania Twain at the top of our voluptuous middle aged lungs, I was feeling a little depressed.

Is all I have to look forward to in my forties a big pile of 80's songs and dealing with my demons? Am I to dance about it? Do I really need a hero - and am I holding out for that hero till the end of the night?

sigh. - It's so depressing, but man, I feel like a woman!