Setting the World on Fire - And Not In A Good Way

I know you guys all love Fran, so I thought I’d tell you a Fran Story. Fran is the guitar player in my band. He’s a very good guitar player. He has very specific tastes regarding what constitutes a good musician…

But for Fran, life exists in the extremes, so if you don’t find yourself in his range of musical (or aesthetic) taste, Fran would like to set you on fire.

Examples of musicians Fran would like to flambe': Eddie From Ohio (great musicians – but they get a goofy/chatty at concerts.), Dave’s former Band mate (who once called Fran “Ace.”), Bela Fleck (I’m so sorry, Bela! I love you – It’s just Fran. It’s Fran.),and Rushad Eggleston (once again, great musician. He’s a cellist. Maybe second to Yo Yo Ma, but again, his stage presence, if you’re Fran, warrants FIRE.)

Being a team player, I sent Francis three top ten lists: One consisted of Actors who might be set on fire (although I am against charbroiling as form of death). The second, non-celebrities I would definitely set on fire (I have this brother-in-law who’s just out of hand…).

The third I will share with you. In a toast to pacifism, I salute:

The Top Ten Musicians I Would SAVE in the Event That They Are Being Set On Fire By Some Jackass:

Bruce Cockburn
Adam Duritz
Adrienne Young
Ollabelle
Antje Duvekot
Lyle Lovett
Bono
David Bowie
Tie: Cyndi Lauper/Gwen Stefani
Tie: Laurie Anderson/Jeff Coffin